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sanzohoshi: (I'm not really that drunk) (Default)
Default
Keywords:
  • I'm not really that drunk
Comment: but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
sanzohoshi: (U asked everyone for their hoodies)
Keywords:
  • U asked everyone for their hoodies
Comment: so u could "safely hug the cactus"
sanzohoshi: (I just...no. You make my soul cry.)
Keywords:
  • I just...no. You make my soul cry.
Comment: You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
sanzohoshi: (I don't get hangovers. Except once.)
Keywords:
  • I don't get hangovers. Except once.
Comment: And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
sanzohoshi: (I hope you fall in a pool of honey)
Keywords:
  • I hope you fall in a pool of honey
Comment: in an immensely populated region of bears.
sanzohoshi: (I didn't punch him)
Keywords:
  • I didn't punch him
Comment: it was just love coming out of my fist
sanzohoshi: (That's the last time)
Keywords:
  • That's the last time
Comment: I try to be adventurous at a gas station
sanzohoshi: (Stop it with the monkey emojis.)
Keywords:
  • Stop it with the monkey emojis.
Comment: It's like sexting with Curious George
sanzohoshi: (I saw a picture of a baby)
Keywords:
  • I saw a picture of a baby
Comment: and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
sanzohoshi: (I find celibacy oppressive.)
Keywords:
  • I find celibacy oppressive.
Comment: Huge waste of my time and talents.
sanzohoshi: (I woke up naked)
Keywords:
  • I woke up naked
Comment: and surrounded by M&Ms
sanzohoshi: (I've never seen so much of my blood)
Keywords:
  • I've never seen so much of my blood
Comment: outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
sanzohoshi: (I have the perkiest tits)
Keywords:
  • I have the perkiest tits
Comment: in all of North America. I'm fine.
sanzohoshi: (Fine I'll cuddle you)
Keywords:
  • Fine I'll cuddle you
Comment: but only for the purpose of trying to survive
sanzohoshi: (Googled 'how drunk am I')
Keywords:
  • Googled 'how drunk am I'
Comment: and it was NOT helpful